Nola’s Birth Story

Nola Marie your birth story is like so many wonderful blessings in our life a story of redemption and of praise. Your birth story is something I longed for but I truly thought would not happen. Your birth story is much more than just the hours I was in labor, it started at the very first appointment I went to for our pregnancy.

Immediately following finding out we were pregnant all I could think of was how I did not want a repeat c section. I did not want the trauma I went through last time, and I did not want to not be able to hold sweet Ellie. I wanted to be able to do it, I wanted to know I was strong enough for a vaginal delivery and that last time was not my fault. Knowing that the doctor that delivered Ellie was not a huge supporter of vbacs I knew we were going to need to switch OBGYNs, which I wasn’t necessarily devastated by considering how I felt about Ellie’s doctor following everything. I found the Ridgegate practice and immediately fell in love with Dr. Boylan and the love and care she showed for our expecting baby. She was very much so pro vbac and thought we would have no problem attempting one when the time came.

Fast forward to 26 weeks with Nola when we take the trip to Castle Rock Adventist for the first time. We went because I was having what I thought were Braxton-Hicks contractions but they were synced in timing and in length. As the nurses monitored me and realized quickly that this wasn’t just Braxton-Hicks this was something more they called in Dr. Zart and tried tribunaline, which stopped my labor with Ellie. As we discussed with the doctor what this could be my contractions became more intense and more frequent, the trib wasn’t working. They transferred us to university hospital because they were not equipped to deliver a 26 week baby and from the looks of things that is what was going to happen. Around three the next morning my contractions settled back down to only four an hour and over the next day they stayed consistently around there. It was determined that I probably had a partial placenta abruption and that we would receive the second steroid shot for her longs and potentially prepare for her to come.

I continued to contract frequently for the next several weeks and was seen by both the MFM specialist and my doctor on a more strict schedule. I was still a candidate for a VBAC but also scheduled a c section for September 4th not at all expecting to reach it but also knowing that my best friend was getting married September 22nd and I didn’t want to get to close to her date. We went into the hospital two more times for monitoring but each time my cervix had not changed so we would go home. The weeks turned into months and though the contractions would not stop, and I was not gaining weight, the ultrasounds showed that our sweet Nola was growing and thriving, and ultimately that is all the mattered. Every week was a victory and though the contractions drove me nuts, and though there were days I couldn’t wait for it to end I knew this time was necessary for her to grow and I knew the lord was answering prayer.

After we passed 35 weeks the reality that this little girl wasn’t coming early and that we were approaching our c section date began to set in. We started planning with our families what day they would come down and who would stay with us to assist with Ellie following the c section. As time continued to pass my anxiety and guilt of having a c section built. I knew a healthy baby was all that mattered but I couldn’t imagine a world where I couldn’t pick up Ellie. I couldn’t imagine how difficult that was going to be for her and how much I was letting her down. I felt guilty for the timing, and I felt guilty for doing this to Ellie. Instead of looking forward to the arrival of our new baby I was dreading the birth and the way it was going to happen.

At our 36 week appointment I brought up that I was beginning to feel similar symptoms to the symptoms that I suffered with Ellie when I had preeclampsia. I was having slight vision problems and I was swelling, my fears of suffering through another preeclamptic birth were looking as though they could become a reality. At my 37 week appointment we addressed that my preeclampsia was not progressing and that where we stood there was no medical reason to induce and as a vbac patient the only form of induction was to break my bag of water and hope things progressed on their own. It was also stated I was only at 2 cms and 75% effaced, which I had been at since 28 weeks. Again the fears of not being able to vbac set in and my heart was already grieving something that had not yet happened. I was asking, begging, begging friends and family to join with me in prayer that lord would grant me the birth I had dreamed of since prior to Ellie. I knew the lord was faithful but I didn’t know which of the two outcomes was his will. I was bouncing on my ball constantly, squatting every time I thought about it, and Ellie and I were walking hours a day. I was going to get my cervix to change, or dehydrate myself trying. At my 38 week appointment I had the PA PollyAnna check me hoping and wishing that she would sweep my membranes. Unfortunately I was still at a 2 and she could not legally strip my membranes until 39 weeks, but suggested that I make another appointment for the end of the week with a doctor since my c section was scheduled for the following Tuesday and Monday was Labor Day. That next appointment was when the lord started flexing his power.

As I sat in the office talking to Dr. Boylan once again in regards to stripping my membranes and how another doctor in the practice told me that I shouldn’t go past 39 weeks with my history she asked the question I wasn’t prepared for. She asked me if I was still comfortable with the c section or if I wanted to wait to go into labor. I knew my answer, I wanted to scream from the rooftop yes cancel, but I also knew we had family in town wanting to be there for the birth. I wanted to cry because I felt like I was backed into a corner and I was doing a major surgery for everyone else not me. So instead of cancelling it the way I wanted to I had her check me and stretch me and I prayed something would change.

The rest of the weekend was spent going to the museum to see the Dead Sea Scrolls and try yet again to walk her out. It was spent in contact with my family and friends begging them to beg with me that the lord would allow something to happen. It was spent celebrating Ellie and her last few days of being an only child and being the center of our whole world. We went to the children’s museum with friends. we went to the American girl doll store to buy her a baby so she could also have one at the hospital. We went and played in the Disney store and bought sister a Pooh bear. Finally I felt like we should visit the hospital partially in wishful thinking partially because I was contracting and I thought we should get checked.

We arrived back at Castle Rock at four on Sunday evening greeted by the most wonderful woman Nichole who was currently the charge nurse for the day. As she began to set up monitors and check me once again we went over the fact that I did not want a c section. We discussed that I was dreading it and that she should just break my water. She told me that I was at a three, which I figured, but that my bag of water was bulging and it we right there. Next god send cane from Becky, the night nurse. She went over everything with Nichole and agreed that I should not have a c section and I should not feel pressured into it. She told me that she has worked with dr. Jones for years and she would assist me in talking to her. She encouraged me that there were options, that maybe she could break my water the next day when I was 39 weeks and or maybe if I was progressing she could just keep me until midnight. She gave me options, and it felt great to be in control. Dr. Jones and Becky came in and it was like the lord took over the room. Dr. Jones looked at me and we discussed our options and she felt it was best to cancel the c section and plan on her breaking my water on Wednesday. It was perfect, I didn’t have to think or second guess anything. As she was getting ready to leave she asked if I wanted her to strip my membranes. Without a second thought I said yes and before we knew it we were doing the walk of shame out of labor and delivery being encouraged that they would see us soon. They gave us tips of doing hands and knees on the bed, but most importantly they told us to relax and enjoy

That night we went to where grandma and grandpa Wilson were staying and as I felt crampy and uncomfortable I also knew it could potentially be our last night with Ellie. We swam and sat in the hot tub trying to relax and enjoy our time. We played with aunt Katie and we laughed. When we left I knew I was feeling more crampy, I knew things were changing and I was desperately praying that they were changing enough. We got home and as we prepared to get Ellie in the bath I noticed I was losing more of my plug and I was super uncomfortable. We gave Ellie her bath and I enjoyed what I hoped would be her last night as just Ellie. We crawled into bed at 12:30 am and I attempted to sleep while also watching the office.

As the night progressed I tossed and turned through contractions. I was up and down having to pee and every time I was there was more blood. I was rocking on the bed and trying to find some place of comfort. All the while Kaleb laid next to me supporting me and checking in.

I checked the clock for the millionth time and decided to jump into the tub at four in the morning hoping my body would relax and maybe I could get some sleep. As the pain grew and spread into my legs I was reminded of when my friend Rebekah told me you will know when they are real, and in that moment I knew. I rocked in the tub, I did hands and knees in the tub, and I tried to pass time. At five I called Kaleb and in and told him we should go. I will never forget his response “sounds good, we can go in the morning I set my alarm for seven.” I laughed and said no we should go now. He called the hospital and explained what was happening and that we should come back, the hospital knew exactly who we were and told us to call Dr. Jones and let her know. Dr. Jones called us back quickly and said things sound like things have really changed head on in. The next thirty minutes were spent making sure we had everything we needed for the hospital and packing kaleb’s bag. As we prepared to leave I snuck in and told Ellie goodbye and whispered that the next time I would see her she would be a big sister.

We arrived at the hospital at six in the morning filled out the same paperwork that had been filled out a million times before, but really only three and waited for the nurse to come down. As Nichole walked down the hall eager to see us back my heart was so excited to see her. I told Kaleb to leave our bags in the cars until we knew we for sure were staying, but I made sure to grab our snacks for our awesome nurses knowing worst case at least they would like our snacks. We walked back to the staff elevators and rode them up to three the entire time me telling her this better be it. She walked us to her favorite room, room 303, and the process began.

Nichole checked me and I was finally a 6 cm and 90%, we were staying we were having a baby! As they set me up on the monitors Kaleb went to grab our bags and my wonderful friend Rebekah came to help and support us. As soon as Kaleb came back he began the process of setting up my diffuser, knowing how important it was for me. Nichole and Kaleb decided to diffuse joy. Seeing Kaleb so passionate to help me have the birth I so desperately wanted made me love him so much more. As soon as the twenty minute read was the offered me the birthing ball and I gladly accepted. As I rocked away my incredible nurse Kate came in and asked the one question I wanted to be able to answer, what did you want out of your birth? I knew I wanted to VBAC, I wanted to be as natural as possible, I wanted to be able to moved while I labored, but if I chose medication I wanted that to. She was excellent and honestly was a game changer to my entire labor process. She went over the medications and told me the anesthesiologist would of course be in and would give me his advice but would not come back unless I asked. I continued mto rock away while he did come in and he did answer my questions. He was great to give me true answers and especially knowing I was VBACing. We were doing it we were going to have a vaginal birth.

As my contractions continued Kate, Rebekah, and Kaleb made sure I was changing positions every thirty minutes. I would rock on the ball, hands and knees on the bed, and lean on the bed and Kaleb (he of course was the most perfect position) all while keeping the most wonderful heating pad close. We passed the time by taking last minute photos I wanted, which included me jumping out of the bed every time I contracted, putting together Nola’s letter board, and talking. The room was peaceful, it was only the people I needed the only noise was the worship music that was playing and the encouraging conversation. I knew the contractions were getting stronger as I was slowly becoming less and less engaged in the group and more and more internal.

The original plan was for Dr. Boylan to come nine to break my water, but decided to let me labor as long as possible in hopes Nola would drop more. At ten thirty she came in and we discussed that if she broke my water it would move faster but it would be more intense. I agreed, she checked me and I was 7.5 cm 100% , she broke my water and the game changed.

Over the next thirty minutes my contractions became much more intense. My time one the ball was spent leaning on Kaleb during the contraction and then trying to rock in the interim. They progressed in intensity so quickly and reached a point when they hit that all I could do was stand. I made it through four awful ones with the last making me feel like I had no control over what was happening during the pain. I couldn’t stand my robe being on at one point one hit I jumped up and tossed my leg onto the bed in hopes to stop the pain. It was that last one that I knew I didn’t want to feel like I was losing it. I wanted the epidural. We paged for Kate and she came running, as I told her what I wanted my incredible husband checked in with me a few times making sure I was truly getting what I wanted. I was confident in my decision and was hoping the epidural would allow me to rest before it was time to push. Sitting through contractions as the Dr. attempted to insert my epidural was the most difficult thing. My contractions were beyond intense and they felt like they were coming constantly. The pressure was growing rapidly and all I could do was cry out to Kaleb and Kate as they supported me through it. He quickly finished and gave me the first dose which would take effect in the next few minutes. As he and Kate were doing the more administrative side of the epidural he laughed and said he knew that if he was going to give me one it was going to be right at the end and he was right.

Kate put the catheter in as quickly as she could and then checked me, she knew I was changing and I was changing fast. They were having a hard time finding Nola’s heart rate and decided they should put an internal monitor on her head, they also wanted to give me a peanut ball; both of these things happened durning Ellie’s birth and my biggest fears almost seemed like a reality, the past was going to repeat itself. As they were putting the internal monitor on Nichole realized I was at a ten and Nola’s head was coming quickly.

The room went from being calm and peaceful to being filled. Ashley introduced herself as my baby’s nurse. Dr. Boylan prepared me for “practice pushes” and Kate talked me through what pushing feels like. Kaleb sat right on my left preparing to assist me in whatever way he could. I remember so vividly being terrified that I was going to once again push for two hours and she still wouldn’t come. On the next contraction we did three practice pushes, and then it was go time. I looked at the clock and saw 11:38 am and wondered what time it would finally be when she was born The first few contractions I felt like was making no progress, that was until I pushed and saw a white blob making its way towards me. I didn’t realize at the time but that blob was Nola’s head. Every push I was crying I can’t and every push Kaleb was reminding me that I could. He was telling me to push harder, to keep going. He was right there with the oxygen mask in between. He told me I was doing it that this was everything I wanted and I was doing it. The next push we went for four instead of three and then Dr. Boylan said if her heart dipped again she would cut. I pushed once, she cut and then I pushed saw the blob of white and kept pushing we pushed for five pushes on the one contraction and then the blob became an entire body. I reached for my girl, I had done it I had pushed my Nola girl out. I heard them say time of birth 12:04 pm and I was still in shock that the baby on my chest was my baby, all I could say was “ Hi hi hi baby.” I had done it! Her scream was beautiful and life changing. I looked over at my husband and as tears streamed down his face and as he kissed me and told me he was proud of me and that I did it I was still in shock. Kaleb immediately tried to move my bra so she could latch. She latched so quickly. Then after two minutes Kaleb finally had the opportunity to cut the cord for real. As the Dr. Boylan delivered my placenta and stitched me the room was filled with such joy. There was laughter and talk of our other children. There was guesses on weight, which Kaleb guessed closest at 6 lbs 7 oz, our girl weighed 6lbs 3 oz. There was encouragement of you did it, and you did great. As Dr. Boylan finished up she came over and looked at the little girl she had known for the last nine months. She congratulated us again and again and I thanked her countless times for giving me the birth I had desired. It was my fairytale.

I’ve never in my life been more proud of myself and more thankful that the lord blessed me with this birth story. He is faithful.

My beautiful Nola Marie, you are perfect. You are a dream. You are so much more than I ever envisioned. We are so excited to be a family of four and to embark on this journey together.